How to Handle the War at "Home"

They say home is where the heart is; which is in the people we love and care about and those that we relate to on a day to day basis. As sure as man is to error, it is inevitable that there will be ugly altercations between you are your network of relationships. This can range from mild anger, disappointment to feelings of full blown hatred and mistrust. So how do we handle interpersonal relationship conflict? Here a few way to manage the war at "home"


Know yourself - At times, we are quick to blame others for misunderstandings whereas it is actually in part our fault. Do you talk too much or are you a bully? Do you listen when others speak or do you rubbish them when they talk?  What angers you? These aspects of yourself come out when you interact with others, and full self awareness can help manage a lot of conflict

Know each other - Once you look inwards, expand your horizons and look at those you relate with. This is not a fast process, it is gradual and needs patience and interest in the other person. Learn what the other person likes, what ticks them off, what their values are and their personality. This can help you relate better with people and reduce conflict

Synchronizing "you" and "them" - Dealing with different personality types is the hardest thing ever. A community needs to have balance of task and process, which is the most common source of conflict. Task is a product of the "talkers" while process is a product of "doers". Too much work and little talk brings about communication problems while too much talk and no work leaves a lot of feeling meetings at the expense of work that needs to be done.

Triangulation - When A and B have a conflict, it is important to talk to another party C about it to get an extra opinion of how to resolve the conflict. However, do not take it personally. This will constitute a personal vendetta and at times, gossip with a third party. Bear in mind that this will do more bad than good to your relationship.

A healthy conflict ratio is good for the growth of interpersonal relationships. However, this is hinged on how well you resolve conflicts. Unresolved conflict simply carries on as excess baggage, and a potential grenade for the next conflict.