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HOW DO I KNOW THEY ARE "THE ONE"?

Think about it for a moment. In your life, you have probably heard lots of advice about love and relationships from so many different people and places. You have probably had some from your friends, and family. 

Not to forget you have had some knowingly and unknowingly from the TV programs you watch, the movies you watch, and the songs you listen to. 

Every year, new songs, TV programs, and movies are all released about finding love. You have got dating shows, reality Tv shows, and every week you have a new app that is promising you that it will help you find the one. 

You have got apps like tinder, OkCupid, and Badoo just to mention a few which try to help you find the one based on your preference. 

All the above influence what you think about love and finding the one. These things also put ideas in our mind about what the other person likes for example girls like men who drive, men love women with ass.  This then tends to form ideas about what you believe about relationships.

There is so much different information, examples, and advice about finding the one out here but most of them are misleading. 

Here are the top 10 ways of knowing when you have found the one: 

They will support and mutually respect your dreams. 

This doesn’t mean they are going to do your dreams for you or they are always going to be there cheering you on to achieve your dreams. But it means that they respect your priority about your dreams. They value what you are chasing and want to see you get there. They are not trying to hold you back, restrict you, trap you, or stop you from chasing your dream and getting there. They want to see you grow genuinely 

They will be present with you in the moment.

When they are with you they don’t get distracted by phone calls, texts, or friends. When they are with you they are with you. They pay attention and enjoy your company. If they keep forgetting what you are saying, chances are they probably not the one. 

They are self-aware and know their self-worth

The person is independent and is able to grow on their own. They have their own set of values and priorities. They are not looking for you to complete them or finish them. They are their own person. They are looking for you to enhance them and help them grow. They are growing with you and will help you grow.

Trust 

Trust is earned. There is mutual trust between the two of you. 

You don’t need external forces to keep the chemistry going

When it comes to the one, you don’t always need someone or something else to keep the chemistry going and make things fresh. When you feel like you always need something like an external form of thrill or excitement to keep everything special between you two, it is a sign that you may actually be not connecting with each other.

You spend time apart but can’t wait to be together 

You are usually comfortable traveling alone to different parts of the country, studying and working in different areas in the country but you can’t wait to be together with them or each other. 

It might be frustrating not being close to someone you love and out of this frustration you might end up weakening your relationship. 

When you have found the one, you don’t let that frustration affect your relationship with them. You find other ways of releasing and sharing the frustration and making sure you don’t ruin your relationship.

You can disagree 

Many people think that when you find the one you basically agree all the time to anything. This is not true. You can actually disagree. You can have different views and opinions and ideas and still learn to work together. 

 You don’t have to like each other’s friends. 

There is always so much pressure to be liked by the other person’s friends for them to like your friends for your friends to like them. Chances are you are putting in way too many tick boxes that are going to be difficult to manage. With the one, you guys get along very well regardless of the different types of friends you have. 

You can be your real self

You can be real self, and not your LinkedIn profile, Facebook profile, or Instagram profile. You can let go of all of those identities and just be yourself. 

You argue to come to an agreed conclusion together. 

You don’t argue to defeat the other person, to beat the other person but to so that you can come to a healthy conclusion together. It’s more of a discussion rather than a debate. It’s not about who is right but it’s about making sure you come to the right conclusion together.

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