Steve: Unprotected Sex makes Mali Safi Take PEP for HIV Prevention.


No Man is an Island

“No man is an Island, “They say; I fully support this narrative after failing to conquer it. My second month at my first job after completing campus and graduating with a bachelor’s degree in Business. Life was not easy, and now I could afford one or two more things I couldn’t before. I decided to try my luck in dating, and since I was not ready for any attachments, I would make sure all was done and dusted within the first week. This went on for a while until I met Mary. Beautiful she was, “Mali Safi,” they say. Being kind and humble are some qualities that made me see what a perfect girlfriend and maybe a wife she would make. I envisioned an excellent relationship. All went as expected at the beginning; I introduced her to my friends and family. I always overlooked the mistakes that I thought were small; little did I know that they would become more prominent. Nevertheless, we got comfortable with each other as time went by.

The Bad

Mary and I often went out on Friday nights, and we both had mastered the art of quenching that Friday sore throat and nursing the Saturday morning gloom. After three months, she moved in, and we started cohabiting. Unfortunately, we got carried away in partying and drinking and never built a healthy and trusting relationship. We played the blame game, as we were both at fault and felt guilty about our actions. We didn’t communicate our feelings and just swept things under the rug… My work schedule became tight, and I could no longer keep up with the parting life. I left work late and tired and would head straight home. She often came home late drunk. I tried to question her, and she would say, “Si nimetoka where he Maisha ni yangu” but I never gave up on her. Damn! I loved that girl. I tried to talk to her and find something to keep her busy since she was yet to find a job, but my efforts bore no fruit. Our sex life went on generally without recognizing any of the red flags she was showing. Friends tried to talk to her to change her ways, but she was adamant. They all advised me to get out of the relationship, but I kept holding on.

The Ugly

I was being foolish for trusting too much, so one Friday night, a Friday that changed my life for good. Mary went out, and the night got the best of her and those she was with. I remember the following morning; she came home different. I could tell from the scare in her voice and the look of regret on her face. I tried to talk to her, but she wouldn’t come clean, and the information I managed to get out of her did not add up. I later found out that she had unprotected sex with someone she had no idea who it was. I was disappointed and in disbelief at this. I managed to talk to a few friends and look up information online. Finally, I found information on PEP drugs. Afterwards, we managed to go to a health facility, and she was given the PEP medication, which is meant to prevent one from contracting HIV/ AIDS after having unprotected sex with someone of unknown status. She agreed to take the drugs for 28-days, this duration was a bumpy ride, but I managed to oversee that she took the pills on time.

Light at the end of the Tunnel

As the 28th day elapsed, I decided to take three days off from my work and dedicate them to her. We visited a VCT together and gained immense knowledge on self-awareness and safe sex measures, which was very insightful. But unfortunately, she broke my trust, and I couldn’t see my future with her.

I have learnt that in the future to make better choices and communicate my concerns with my partner. My advice to other people is that communication is vital and that having a trusting and healthy relationship is essential.


By Steve -24 


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