Lessons from love and heartbreaks- Musa 21

We were so profoundly in love with each other.

I'm a young man of 21 years old from Keringet, a tiny area in Nakuru County. My tale centres on my recent struggles with love. My first love was a lady called J. When we started dating in high school, everything seemed ideal. We agreed not to date anyone else since we were so profoundly in love with each other.

The split

J and I parted ways after we finished high school. The ‘once in a while visits' began to seem strange because we only interacted through phone calls. She seemed so unsure every time we spoke on call, despite her frequent claims of being busy.

I fell in love with another girl.

I started having feelings for another girl at this time. She trusted me enough to open up about her problems and secrets because we had been friends for a long time, and I did the same. We were getting along very well, and I wanted us to take our friendship to the next level. She suddenly revealed to me that she had fallen in love with my best buddy one day. I was hurt and felt betrayed.

I couldn’t believe it.

It was extremely difficult for me to comprehend as she talked about her new relationship. She never thought of me as a potential lover for her despite the many years we had spent together, through good times and bad. However, I was aware of the reality that "change is inevitable." Our relationship would never be as it was before.

It made me question my friendships.

 I assumed that perhaps the fact that I was not financially secure at the time prevented her from pursuing a relationship with me. I wondered whether some of my friends were just there to take advantage of me, especially since I was there for her, but she moved as soon as she found someone ‘better’. I was filled with so many questions, which became insecurities.

Lessons for the Road Untraveled

I decided not to let these uncertainties and sadness get the better of me. I realized it was best to let go of a relationship because love cannot be pushed. It was a difficult choice, but I had to make it for my own well-being. I was motivated to establish new relationships with dependable individuals because I had gained important lessons from this event. I could apply what I now learned about what I desired in a companion when I later met other romantic interests.  Although it was a challenging time in my life, it motivated me to put my happiness first.