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I’ve been cheated on


The meaning of cheating differs from person to person.  For some people cheating means having sex with someone else, to others cheating means, flirting with others, kissing, and sexting others.

For others, cheating could be finding out your partner spent the night at a friend’s place rather than you and lied about it. 

There are many reasons why cheating happens and it can be in happy relationships as well as those with problems.

Some of the many reasons for cheating include:

  • Feeling bored in your relationship or with your partner
  • Wanting to end it but being unsure how to
  • Feeling insecure and wanting attention
  • Not thinking about the consequences and getting lost in the moment
  • Wanting to cheat and not caring about the consequences
  • Getting a kick out of taking risks

If you think you have been cheated on, 

  • Give yourself time. Finding out can be a shock to you. You can talk to your trusted friend and let them support you. 
  • You have to be sure about it. Don’t accuse your partner of cheating unless you have very good evidence that he or she is cheating on you. 
  • If you’re wrong, it could lead to anger, denial, and damage to your relationship. Instead, try to have a calm conversation with your partner. 
  • Although talking to your partner may feel painful, it’s important you can ask questions and assess exactly what has happened. It is important to have such conversations in private
  • Listen to what your partner tells you rather than focusing on what you have always believed about cheating.
  • Ask your partner to tell you the truth however painful it is. Recovery after cheating is always worse if lies are told early on.
  • Avoid blaming yourself. You can never be responsible for someone else’s choices – especially cheating.
  • Take time to think about what you want to happen next


Only you can decide if you are prepared to forgive your partner and work together to rebuild your relationship or end the relationship.

Good luck 

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